I’m scared, no I’m terrified, as I wait for the results of my latest attempt at Comlex level 1. This is my third and final try to pass a test that every other D.O. in the world has passed. I know that I’m not an idiot, but this test has really gotten the best of me.
My stomach is tied in knots. I get nauseous every day when I check the NBOME website to see if my score has been posted. I haven’t slept good in a week. I’m tired. My blood pressure is out of sight. I don’t know what to do.
It’s been two weeks since I took the test. It’s your standard computerized test. Others get their results immediately. The NBOME takes about a month to get the results out. I don’t know why. The test is no standard test. There was not one straight forward question on the exam. For example, a patient has these symptoms, what is the disease? No, Comlex questions are more like the patient has these symptoms, what was the name of the dog of the scientist for whom this disease is named?
I don’t know what I’m going to do if I get thrown out of medical school. I’m 40 years old with a family that needs my support. I’m over $100,000 in debt for an education I may not be able to use. What are the career options for someone dismissed from medical school? I see myself managing a McDonald’s or a grocery store, if I don’t pass.
The painful part is that I almost passed the second attempt. A score of 400 is needed to pass and I scored a 397. Yeah, that’s right, a 397! Do you believe my luck? A few days before that attempt I became a grandfather for the first time and a niece that was born 3 months premature died. So, I keep telling myself that I was off on that attempt.
I studied for this last attempt. I put in hours every day of answering questions that mostly made sense. I got to take Comlex and found the questions not so straight forward. The student is allowed to comment on each question if they wish. I commented on one question that was very obtuse that it must have been badly translated from a foreign language.
So why am I telling you about my plight? Because I needed to tell someone. I just needed to vent so I don’t explode. My wife is supportive and I love her, but I don’t know if she fully understands the situation. She probably does, she just doesn’t want to add to my anxiety. I’m freaking out here. I want to run away but have no where to go.
I thought finding out that I was accepted to Medical school was the biggest moment of my life. Man, was I wrong!!
God Bless
Ron
